• Emi Valerio

is Dating a Distraction?

Have you ever gotten to know someone and then after multiple interactions they hit you with the "I am not in the place to date because I am too busy working on my life goals". Well ladies that was me.

I was getting to know someone and although I felt that everything was going in the right direction things began to shift. You see I started to make excuses for this man and saying to myself "he was right, we both were to busy for a relationship". After much prayer the lord revealed to me that their is a season for everything. (Ecclesiastes 3:1) (Ecclesiastes 3:8) He revealed to me that the issue was not time but how we effectively communicate and balance our lives.

For the first time in years I came to a realization that I always made excuses for a mans disappointment. I realized that what he was saying was being sugar coated. In short I realized that his statement "I am not in the place to date because I am to busy" was a polite way to say "I like you, but not ENOUGH to date you".

You see I look at powerful couples such as the Obamas, Will and Jada Smith, the Beckhams, and the Timberlake's and realize that what they ALL one thing in common. That one thing is that as a team they work together to achieve goals beyond this world. They've chosen one another to do life with. I believe these dynamic duos support and encourage each other daily!

In my life, I've seen relationships whom where distractions to one another. Where one person gives up on their dreams because their partner did not see the worth in pursuing their dream. Those relationships turned to marriages which ended in infidelity, domestic violence, and divorce.

The relationship I want to build is one where we are working together and growing together to build a sustaining partnership. A relationship built on God, friendship, trust, honesty, genuine affection, loyalty , and respect. This type of relationship would take focus, drive, and balance from both parties to achieve God affirmed goals. This relationship right here will be an equally yoked relationship and will NOT be a distraction.

I am a person who calculates all risk because I am not a risk taker. It's unfortunate that the feelings I had were not reciprocated, but I know that this rejection was God's protection. I know my worth and a "I'm sorry I'm not in a place to date" is no longer a good enough statement for me! It's time to STOP making excuses for these men and realize that I am the PRIZE!

With Love,


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